• There’s No Trophies for These WTF Post-Championship Celebrations
  • Brendan Maloney/USA TODAY Sports
  • The San Antonio Spurs will celebrate their fifth championship today with a parade scheduled for 6 p.m. local time. Many have already speculated about exactly how Tim Duncan will turn up in the aftermath of their Finals demolition of the Miami Heat, but don’t sell Timmy and his crew short. Lots of unexpected ratchetry goes down once the final buzzer sounds. This list just charts some of the most noteworthy WTF post-’chip moments.

     

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  • Eric Snow puts Michael Jordans autographed shoes from ‘96 Finals up for auction

    The 1996 NBA Finals pitted the Seattle SuperSonics (RIP) against the Chicago Bulls. Michael Jordan’s Bulls would win the series in six games. Weird enough, Michael Jordan himself entered Seattle’s locker room and gifted a pair of black-and-red Air Jordan XI signature sneakers that he wore during the series to Eric Snow. The sneakers weren’t signed until August 2004 at one of Jordan’s basketball camps. Nearly 20 years after the ‘96 Finals, Eric Snow is auctioning the shoes off—maybe his assistant job at SMU doesn’t pay as well as those NBA checks. There are six bids on the pair and the current maximum is close to $10,000. Interested? The auction has a few hours left and can be found here.

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  • Ron Artest's epic postgame interview after the 2010 Finals

    The artist formerly known as Ron Artest was extremely happy after winning the 2010 NBA Finals. He brought his entire family up to the podium after screaming about a box of Wheaties when entering the room. After being asked the first question, Artest went on a tangent for about three minutes, without actually answering the question that was asked. In the end, Artest thanked Wheaties, Kobe and his psychiatrist for the championship. Yup, sounds like Ron Artest.

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  • Heat fans threw shoes at Mike Miller

    One of the most memorable plays from the 2013 NBA Finals was Mike Miller dropping a three with one shoe on in Game 6. After losing it on the previous defensive possession, Miller tossed the shoe to the Heat bench and ran to the three-point line to drain the shot. During an interview during the Heat’s championship celebration, fans started throwing shoes at the stage. LeBron didn’t need his headband and Miller didn’t need his shoe that year. Accessories are overrated.

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  • Shaq rapping and Mark Madsen dancing during the ‘01 Finals parade

    The sequel to “White Men Can’t Jump” should be named “White Men Can’t Dance,” especially after Mark Madsen’s performance at the 2001 NBA Finals parade for the Lakers. The combination of Shaq rapping and Madsen dancing was extremely bizarre but proved that anything goes once you’ve won. Shaq tried his hand at rapping but let’s be thankful that Madsen didn’t pursue a career on “Dancing With The Stars.”

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  • Elgin Baylor auctioned off his NBA Championship ring

    Elgin Baylor had a hell of a career, but was 0-for-8 in NBA Finals appearances. At the beginning of the 1971-72 season, Baylor was suffering from major knee problems and was forced to retire nine games into the season. As soon as Baylor retired, the Los Angeles Lakers ripped off 33 wins in a row. To make matters worse, the Lakers would defeat the Knicks in the Finals that year without Baylor, to raise their first banner earned in Los Angeles. As a consolation prize, the Lakers gifted Baylor with a championship ring that season. Apparently the ring didn’t mean much to Baylor, because he wound up auctioning it off for around $40,000-60,000.

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  • A 1979 NBA Championship ring slipped off Mike Uporsky’s hand and into the ocean

    Mike Uporsky was an assistant coach for the Seattle SuperSonics when they won the NBA Finals in 1979. Uporsky probably wore his championship ring as much as his wedding band, that is until he lost it. While walking his dog on the beach back in May 2013, the 1979 NBA Finals championship ring fell off his finger and went MIA. Uporsky hired a metal detector specialist to find the ring, although nothing has been announced if the ring was ever recovered. Uporsky described the loss being, “like losing a family member.” So, if any of you are wearing Uporsky’s 1979 NBA Championship ring, you better call the Redondo Beach police immediately.

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  • Bill Walton rode a bike to the 1977 NBA Championship parade, lost his bike, then had it returned

    If you said that Bill Walton was a bicycle aficionado then this might not be that weird—but who really knows that? When the Blazers won the championship in 1977, Bill Walton decided to ride his bike to the parade, because what hippie millionaire wouldn’t? Of course, the parade area was crammed with people and Walton was separated from his faithful bike. At the commencement of the parade, Walton asked that whoever took the bike return it, so that he could ride home. Weird enough, the bike was actually returned to Walton.

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  • The Heat had 100K of alcohol comped after winning in 2013

    Let’s face it: millionaires are most often the people that constantly receive free stuff. Well, while the Heat were celebrating their 2013 NBA championship at Story Nightclub last year, the team ran up a tab of 100 $850 bottles of Dom Perignon and three $5,000 bottles of Jeroboams champagne, for a total of $100,000. That $100,000 is a lot to us common folk, but not to someone who makes that in a week, like the Miami Heat. Well, the owner of the club decided to comp the entire $100,000 tab. Owner David Grutman must be a Heat fan, because he charged Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban $90,000 for a 15-liter bottle of Armand de Brignac champagne. Lesson: if you’re ever in Miami, walk into the club with a Heat jersey on and see if that gets you any freebies.

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  • DeShawn Stevenson got arrested for public intoxication after the Mavs beat the Heat

    Former Mavs shooting guard, DeShawn Stevenson, partied a little too long after the Finals and was arrested for public intoxication in Irving, Texas two days after the Mavs first NBA championship. According to police, Stevenson had no idea where he was when he was arrested. Irving police officer John Argumaniz said, “They felt he was a danger to himself and others. Basically, he was intoxicated to a point where [police] didn’t feel comfortable letting him walk away or leave. They didn’t have any other options at that point.”

    Stevenson fired back by saying, “I always knew where I was at. … If it was that bad, if it was that wasted, I wouldn’t have been out of jail in three hours on a $400 fine,” he said. “I just think people, they take things out of proportion, and when you’re a champion everything is under a microscope.”

    Stevenson was released on $475 bond a few hours after being arrested — an amount that he probably had no issue paying. If you ever win an NBA Championship, don’t walk off to a random apartment complex in Texas.

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  • The Mavs' 2011 celebration was wild, but not as crazy as the time they lost

    After the Mavs Finals win over the Heat in 2011, the team headed straight to Club Liv in Miami without eating any food and went HAM. As Dirk said, “it got ugly in there.” The Mavericks didn’t wind up leaving until around 8:30 A.M. and continued to party for the next three days. According to Dirk, Jason Terry was the one teammate that was the closest to not making it out alive.

    But according to Dirk, it still wasn’t as bad as when the Mavs lost the Finals in ‘06:

    “I actually think we partied harder in ’06 when we lost just to forget about it than we did now. In ’06, Jet picked me up for the party bus almost every day, and we went somewhere just to make us forget and have a good time. We ended up in Vegas after three hard weeks.” Can’t you picture Jet and Dirk taking turns of sipping a nice bottle of red wine while discussing how much they despise Dwyane Wade? Talk about depressing.

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